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March 2011
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Jen [userpic]
Wisconsin jokes

You know you are in Wisconsin when:

1. Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor on the
2. "Vacation" means going up nort' to Crivitz for the weekend.
3. You measure distance in hours.
4. You know several people who have hit deer more than once.
5. You often switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day and back again!
6. You use a down comforter in the summer - and gloves.
7. You drive at 65 MPH through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard,
without flinching.
8. You see people wearing hunting clothes at social events.
9. You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked.
10. You think of the major food groups as venison, beer, fish, and berries.
11. You carry jumper cables in your car and your girlfriend knows how to use
12. There are 7 empty cars running in the parking lot at the Fleet Farm at any
given time.
13. You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.
14. Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow.
15. You think sexy lingerie is tube socks and flannel pajamas.
16. You know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road
17. It takes you 3 hours to go to the store for one item even when you're in a
rush because you have to stop and talk to everyone in town.
18. You buy your Christmas presents at Fleet Farm.(Or is it Farm 'N Fleet?)


Your whole family wears green and gold to church on Sunday.
You define summer as three months of bad sledding.
Snow tires come standard on all your cars.
You refer to the Packers as "we".
You have gotten frostbitten and sunburned in the same week.
You can identify an Illinois accent.
You know what cow-tipping is.
You learned to drive a tractor before the training wheels were off your bike.
Down South to you means Chicago.
A brat is something you eat.
You have no problem spelling Milwaukee.
You consider Madison exotic.
You got a passport to go to Minnesota.
You don't have a coughing fit from one sip of Pabst Blue Ribbon.
You can actually pronounce Oconomowoc.
You know what a bubbler is.
Your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a cow next to your blue spruce.
Your neighbor throws a party to celebrate his new machine shed.
You go out for fish fry every Friday.
You can recognize someone from Illinois from their driving.
You know how to polka.
Formal wear is blue jeans and a baseball cap.
You were unaware there is a legal drinking age.
Your 4th of July Family Picnic was moved indoors due to frost.
You know where Waukesha is AND can pronounce it.
You decided to have a picnic this summer because it fell on a weekend.
You can visit Luxembourg, Holland, Belgium, Denmark, Berlin, New London & Poland
all in one afternoon.
You only know three spices: salt, pepper and ketchup.
You've seen mosquitoes with landing lights.
You have more miles on your snowblower than your car.
You owe more money on your snowmobile than on your car.
The local paper covers major headlines on 1 page, but requires 4 pages for
At least twice a year, your kitchen doubles as a meat processing plant.
Your snowblower gets stuck on the roof.
You think the start of deer season is a national holiday.
You find 0 degrees a little chilly.
You know what to do with a Blatz...
--------*Very* true. Still Wisconsins not that bad ;p

Current Mood: hyperhyper
Current Music: Blue-When You Come Back (Radio 1)