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March 2011
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Jen [userpic]
"I look inside myself and see my heart is black"

*sigh* Another day without anything important to say. A poet? Maybe.

I started training at Ihop tonight, with more to come tomorrow. I'm working fridays and saturdays 6pm-6am and sundays 4pm-10pm. I'm sure the Sundays are going to fuck me up the most, getting home sometime between 7 & 8 am and having to leave by 3pm. I'm sure I'll be able to get some sleep. With the way I've been sleeping lately it may not matter. I've stopped falling asleep naturally, laying in bed again for an hour or two before finally taking some Tylenol pms in order to actually sleep. I've fallen again into a deep depression. I need to be held. Badly. I feel the urge to cry, but no tears come. I think that when someone does hold me the dam may burst. *sigh*

Back in July I posted a piece called Fragments and Broken Dreams. In late August I was writing, random thoughts and lines that had no rhyme but I needed to get them out of my head to quiet things down. I wrote two pieces of that nature, and have decided to keep the fragment theme going. I give to you Fragments and Broken Dreams parts two and three:

Fragments and Broken Dreams-II:
Copyright 2005 Jennifer Alexander

You stood with me
On the edge of sanity
Pulling me back
Keeping my mind intact
Kept me whole
When I felt alone
Tossed aside
Cast out
Put on the shelf
Collecting dust
While my heart's blood
Turned to rust
I need you to stay
To pull me away
Hold me close
Make me feel important

Fragments and Broken Dreams-III
Copyright 2005 Jennifer Alexander

Dark angel
Fallen from grace
Bloody tears on my face
Existing day to day
Fall to pieces
Only alone
Lost sense of self
Placed high upon a shelf
Cryptic writings
Only for myself
Locked away
Explored my whim
Reflections of him
Another step down
From peace

Current Mood: melancholymelancholy
Current Music: The Rolling Stones-Paint It Black